Mondays
in middle school are always current events homework for my kids. So
they search the news for something interesting... and most of the time I
hate for them to do that. Because I don't even watch the news. Except
for the weather. Because I'm of the thought that there's enough bad
just waiting to happen without me searching it out on my TV or
computer.
But
I know the current events homework for my 2 oldest will today focus on
the tragedy in DC. And my thoughts keep going back to the idea that we
were just there a few weeks ago on vacation - at the Navy yard - as
guests at a Marine Corps function. As odd as this sounds to some... like
my husband... I've always had a time and space issue - confusion,
really.... kind of like I missed one of the key childhood developmental steps
required to be fully functional. I have great trouble picturing and
feeling the reality of things that are out of my view. Like tragedies in other
places. But maybe that comes down to my natural selfishness. Cue
my post from yesterday about mercy and grace - and really, I just can't
get enough.
I've
spent a lifetime trying to keep my kids from bad news. And bad in
general,... but
it still comes. It seeps, it crawls, it finds. And sometimes seeing the bad
is easier than trying
to manipulate and dig and find something good. So we take it all in.
Like with the middle school current events social studies homework.
And I don't know all the
facts of the DC situation today. And I'm not saying there's even one
good thing to be found. Bad is bad. And we need to feel that - on occasion - just as
much as we need to feel the good - so the good actually means something
to us.
Yesterday
Sam was given 2 stuffed bears at the estate sale next door. He offered
to pay, but the lady gave them to him. I guess because he had been
such a regular and loyal customer over the last 3 days. But when she
gave him the bears, I wanted to say.... lady, you have no idea what my
boys are gonna do to those things. (And there was at least one game of
bear exterminator going on that I overheard.) But I walked in the boys
room this morning
and sweet mother of Jesus, Sam had made up his bed. And tucked in his
new friends for the day. And I fell in love with that little boy all
over again.
I
fussed at David today for too often pointing out the negatives about
our kids... for example, how our kids don't eat vegetables on their
hamburgers - and other kids do. Other kids also curse, and disrespect
their elders. So I think we actually got lucky with ours up to this
point. If
anti-vegetable is the worse they ever do... I can live with no lettuce,
onion and tomato.
So
for the current events of today.... my heart hurts for another terrible
loss that
can't be explained or excused. My heart hurts that every time something
like this happens, we either get more afraid and add another level of
anger to what we already naturally have. Or we become more and more
used to it. And it becomes our new normal. And my heart hurts for the
ones who are today dealing with a tremendous hurt that I can't even
imagine. And no one
should have to.