Thursday, April 6, 2017

Which in the words of the Lord, or maybe not,.... this is just sucky

 Things that irritate me.  My writing warm up....

People who go straight in a turn only lane.
People who are in a hurry.
People who honk.
Having a slow leak in my tire.
Trying to find pants that fit.
Not being able to find pants that fit.
When people let their kids do bad things.
Kids who do bad things.
Adults who do bad things.
Grumpy faces.
Running out of hot water.
Running out of anything. Especially dessert or money.
Skinny jeans.

This is totally just a list off the top of my head.  I reserve the right to amend or add at any time.  

I think I'm a bit delusional of late. Not in the way that I think I see visions of old boyfriends still crying over their heartache and such... but in such a way that I somehow thought life, especially mom life, would become easier the older the boys got.  .....  Like that time I could've sworn I saw a dog driving a car in the Chili's parking lot.  I'm still convinced it was a dog, but decided that maybe he was just keeping the drivers seat warm while waiting for his human to pick up his cheeseburger and curly fries. 

I have been hearing things today, however - in the kitchen ceiling.   I know it has something to do with the plumbing and in my professional opinion, no pipes should ever sound like this. 

The sound reminds me of this scene from I Love Lucy where Lucy and Ricky and Ethel and Fred stop off at a roadside motel on their way to somewhere.....

Of course Fireman Dave is at the station for the next almost 100 hours, which for you non-firemen out there, is 4 shifts -  so if something bad happens, I might call you to bring over some buckets. 

But seriously, the battle never ends.  The boys are beating me down one wet towel tossed on the floor at a time.  And y'all, I thought I was parenting when they were little and I told them to not eat the sand out of the sand box.

Monday morning Kid 1 called all distraught and upset from school because he was sick and wanted to come home.  I actually flip flopped in my proper reaction to that because, well..... being sick actually made him call me.  But then I felt bad for wishing him ill for my selfish gain, and did what every respectable mom on her way to teach a class downtown would do.  I sent him to the school nurse.  Turns out he hadn't eaten breakfast, went by the Starbucks with a friend for an iced coffee - extra sugar and caffeine, please - and then went to his two hour football practice at school.  I would totally throw up after that, too.

It all turned out fine.  He recovered, and then I texted him my fitness professional's view of caffeine and its ill effects on the body ( including, but not limited to elevated heart rate and dehydration).  He never responded because the mom need had already passed.

And seriously, I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.... THIS just happened this very afternoon.  My texts to Kid 1 are in the yellow.... as you can see, the authoritative voice of reason and proud supporter of manners everywhere.

Thank you Kid 1 for treating me like an actual person.  For one sentence.  Have mercy.  I was just in the post office discussing this whole thing with the US Postal Service lady and something must be in our Dallas air because her daughter pulled a similar stunt today.  We both agreed that we don't get paid enough for this.  

Kid 2 is kind of my saving grace right now - as we sit peacefully and watch the drama play out between Rayna and Deacon and their non-stop love on Nashville.  I swear their love has been through alcoholism, a near death drunk driving incident and an illegitimate child. Really, is that still a thing or am I dating myself in my cultural references?  Who knows, but as far as Kid 2 goes, I know he's probably planning some big teen mutiny or fantastic voyage into the unknown to surprise me at any given time.  I'm on guard at all times. After all, I'm filling his head with all sorts of sin and nonsense while we sit on the couch waiting to see who the father of Juliette's baby is.  

And Kid 3 - here we are again;  which has taken up so much of my mind space lately.  I really had no idea that it had been almost two weeks since I wrote a blog post.  But today Facebook reminded me that hundreds of people haven't heard from me in a while......  Thank you Facebook.  I'm going to take that as a greeting card style gesture of affirmation and friendship.

Kid 3 - we're the same place we land at the end of each school year - with the question of, Will he pass or not?  And y'all, if you take away one sentence from this entire post today, let it be this one.  The whole school thing with Kid 3 simply breaks my heart.   We start each year with new hope that this combination of classes and teachers will work.  That if we try to place him in an advanced class where the class has more hands on opportunities to learn, rather than just desk sittin' style learning... that maybe he'll be able to stay focused well enough to learn better.  That if we surround him with kids that are more focused on their studies, that he might not only be more focused on his work, but be encouraged to try harder. 

In third grade, I remember Kid 3 feeling sad about how the kids at his group table treated him.  Want to know how they treated him?  Mean.  With a capital M.  He would come home telling us how kids that used to be his friends weren't as nice to him anymore because he wasn't quite in the same learning ball park as they were.  And how the kids at his table would get frustrated and just do the work as a group - minus Kid 3 - which left him to figure out the world on his own. 

So fast forward to 7th grade, where he gets much the same response from his classmates.  And teachers.  They just move on, too.  It's public school, they have to move on.  I get it.  I taught it.  I really, really get it.  But it still makes me sad for every kid who comes home and tells his parents that all the other kids are able to do this and that and how everyone else is just a lot smarter than he is. 

Kid 3 - one day I hope you read this.  And I hope you hear me telling you for the millionth time that you are smart.  That you are so creative and imaginative.  That I see that you are interested and that you really want to do what you need to do when your brain catches up with you. 

So y'all, today let me just try to tell you what Attention Deficit Disorder is like for a 13 year old boy.  No, it's not the generic I can't pay attention in class because I never learned to pay attention in class so give me some medicine to make me behave.  What it is, is a delayed response time as the brain waits to hear what has already been said moments before - all while the rest of the world has gone on to the next thing.  It's hearing so much noise around you that you can't distinguish what's important and what's not.  It's getting so far behind everyone else because you're still walking to the train station while everyone else already got on the train. 

And once they've left you?  They're not coming back.  Pretend school is a game of Monopoly.   The school year starts with everyone at GO on the first day.  And while most kids roll the learning dice and progress along their 7th grade game board, Kid 3 rolls the dice and has to think about what it means.  And while he thinks about what it means, the teacher has already told the class to roll the dice again.  And while the rest of the kids round the game board toward the finish line, Kid 3 is still, though eight months into the school year, still only a few steps from where he started.  But by now, he's built up eight months of frustration.  And eight months of mean words and discouragement from other students as well as the teachers.  So he stops trying.  He's stuck in Monopoly jail and embarrassed to ask for help because he knows it makes the other kids mad.  He's also learned that it makes the teachers mad.  Which in the words of the Lord, or maybe not, is just sucky. 

So we're back where we were at the end of 6th grade, and 5th, and 4th. 

And Fireman Dave and I are back wondering what on earth we're going to do this time.  I've actually made a creative suggestion to the school and am waiting on a response.  And y'all, I need the power of prayer in numbers on this one because I know for a fact that we're probably the first family in the school district to suggest an alternative education plan while still keeping our kid enrolled in his school.  I've found an online study program for kids just like Kid 3 - a program that will allow him to take his more difficult subjects online as a home school student - think math and science - while still benefiting from the school environment and the great teachers in the subjects he does well in. 

But as of now we're waiting to see if our request will be approved.  Y'all, I'm asking for you to pray God's power on Kid 3 and this darned school situation.  I'm asking you to reach out your praying hands and virtually lay them on this need of my sweet boy.  I also need you to look beyond what may sound like the crazy ramblings of a mother running on too little sleep and too much worry, and just be a friend to me right now please.  

Y'all, I'm the first one to tell you that prayer isn't magic. And I know that no amount of prayer can change God's mind about something he already has in the works.  But I know for a fact that God can change the hearts and minds of his people.  And I really need that to happen for Kid 3 this time around. 

Thank you and love to you this week.

Would you like to comment?

  1. Christi Harris-LazaroApril 6, 2017 at 11:30 PM

    People/kids can be so cruel and for what?. I hope the school approves your suggestion. I know my niece home schools her kids 3 days a week and they attend school 2 days per week and they love it! Not in DISD though. All kids learn differently and not all at the same pace and I'll just bet he's probably smarter than most. May not be learning at the same crazy pace but still learning at his own pace and that's okay! I'll be praying that his frustrations lessen and that he is able to overlook the ignorance of others, feel confident about himself and able to do his very best. With the way they teach and move on so quickly, I'm surprised that so many are able to keep up. I'm sure glad I'm not in school these days...but I'll be praying for better school days for #3.�� ...and more patience and understanding from teachers and peers.

    1. Oh Christi, yes, yes and yes. And thank you for these words. Sometimes I put stuff out here and then scare myself because, for the love of Pete, I just put so much stuff out there!

      But in my heart I know plenty of people understand and are probably just waiting for someone to say it out loud.

      You are a sweet friend.


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